Frequently Asked Questions
Answers to common questions about grief, supporting others, and how HavenGrace can help.
ABOUT HAVENGRACE
What is HavenGrace? HavenGrace is a grief support resource providing practical tools for anyone navigating loss—and for those trying to support someone who is. We offer guided journals, free articles, copy-paste scripts, and a community that understands. Our mission is simple: no one should walk through grief alone.
Who is HavenGrace for? HavenGrace is for:
- Anyone experiencing grief (loss of a parent, spouse, child, friend, pet, or any loved one)
- Anyone supporting someone who’s grieving (friends, family, coworkers, caregivers)
- Organizations wanting to better support people through loss (churches, workplaces, healthcare providers)
Is HavenGrace a religious organization? HavenGrace is spiritually welcoming but not religiously affiliated. Our name reflects the idea of finding refuge and compassion during loss. Our resources are designed to help anyone, regardless of faith background or beliefs.
Who created HavenGrace? HavenGrace was founded by someone who knows what it’s like to grieve—and what it’s like to want to help someone who’s grieving but not know how. We built the resource we wish we’d had.
How is HavenGrace different from other grief support? Most grief resources give you theory. We give you action. Our articles include copy-paste text messages, word-for-word scripts, and step-by-step guides you can use immediately. We believe grief support should be practical, not just philosophical.
USING OUR RESOURCES
Are your resources free? Many of our resources are completely free, including our articles, guides, and email support. Our grief journals are available for purchase, and future programs may have associated costs—but we’re committed to keeping core resources accessible to everyone.
How do I use the copy-paste text messages? Simply find a message that fits your situation, copy it, and paste it into your text message or email. You can use them word-for-word or adapt them to sound more like you. The goal is to give you a starting point when you don’t know what to say.
Can I share your articles with others? Absolutely. Please share freely. If someone you know could benefit from our resources, send them a link. That’s why we’re here.
How do I sign up for your email list? Visit [myhavengrace.com] and enter your email at the bottom of any page. You’ll receive our welcome guide plus ongoing resources, tips, and support. We’ll never spam you or sell your information.
ABOUT THE JOURNALS
What makes your grief journals different? Our journals aren’t blank pages. They’re guided experiences with thoughtful prompts designed for specific stages of grief. We don’t tell you how to feel—we give you space to process what you’re already feeling, without pressure to “do it right.”
Which journal should I start with? If you’re in the early days of loss, start with “The First 30 Days.” If you’re supporting someone else, check out our free guides first. More specialized journals (loss of mother, loss of spouse, etc.) are coming soon.
Where can I buy the journals? Our journals are available on Amazon. [Link coming soon]
Can I buy journals in bulk for my organization? Yes. If you’re a church, hospice, hospital, or other organization interested in bulk orders or partnership, contact us at hello@myhavengrace.com.
ABOUT GRIEF (GENERAL)
How long does grief last? There’s no timeline. Grief isn’t something you “get over”—it’s something you learn to carry differently over time. Some people feel a shift after several months; others carry acute grief for years. Both are normal. Anyone who tells you that you should be “over it” by a certain point doesn’t understand grief.
Is what I’m feeling normal? Probably yes. Grief can look like sadness, anger, numbness, relief, guilt, anxiety, physical pain, exhaustion, or even moments of unexpected joy. All of these are normal. Grief isn’t linear, and there’s no “right” way to experience it.
What are the stages of grief? You may have heard of the “five stages” (denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance), but grief doesn’t actually follow a predictable order. You might experience all of these, none of these, or bounce between them randomly. The stages are a framework, not a checklist.
When should I seek professional help? Consider reaching out to a therapist or counselor if:
- You’re unable to function in daily life for an extended period
- You’re having thoughts of self-harm or suicide
- You’re using alcohol or substances to cope
- Your grief feels “stuck” and nothing seems to help
- You simply want professional support (you don’t need to be in crisis to seek help)
If you’re in crisis, please contact the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline by calling or texting 988.
Is it okay to feel relief after someone dies? Yes. Relief is a normal part of grief, especially after a long illness or difficult relationship. Feeling relieved doesn’t mean you didn’t love them. It means you’re human.
Why do I feel fine one moment and devastated the next? This is sometimes called a “grief ambush” or “grief wave.” Triggers can be unexpected—a song, a smell, a random Tuesday. This is completely normal and doesn’t mean you’re going backward. Grief comes in waves, not stages.
SUPPORTING SOMEONE WHO’S GRIEVING
What should I say to someone who’s grieving? Keep it simple: “I’m so sorry. I love you. I’m here.” You don’t need to have perfect words. Acknowledge the loss, express care, and make no demands. For specific messages, read our guide: [50 Texts to Send Someone Grieving]
What should I NOT say? Avoid phrases like “everything happens for a reason,” “they’re in a better place,” “at least they lived a long life,” or “let me know if you need anything.” These are well-intentioned but often hurt more than they help. For a full breakdown, read: [What NOT to Say to Someone Grieving]
How long should I keep checking in? Longer than you think. Most people receive a flood of support right after a loss, then everyone disappears after a few weeks. Keep showing up—at the two-week mark, the one-month mark, and especially around holidays, birthdays, and anniversaries. Consistent presence matters more than perfect words.
What if I say the wrong thing? You probably will at some point—and that’s okay. An imperfect message sent is better than a perfect message you never send. If you realize you’ve said something hurtful, a simple follow-up helps: “I’ve been thinking about what I said, and I’m not sure it came out right. I’m sorry.”
Should I bring up the person who died? Yes. Many grieving people feel like the world is trying to forget their loved one. Hearing their name, sharing a memory, or simply acknowledging that they existed can be a gift.
CONTACT & SUPPORT
How can I contact HavenGrace? Email us at hello@myhavengrace.com. We read every message.
Do you offer one-on-one grief counseling? No. HavenGrace provides educational resources and community support, not professional therapy. If you need clinical support, we encourage you to work with a licensed therapist or counselor.
Can I share my story with HavenGrace? We’d be honored to hear it. Email us at hello@myhavengrace.com. With your permission, we may share your story (anonymously or with credit) to help others feel less alone.
How can I support HavenGrace? The best way to support us is to share our resources with someone who needs them. You can also:
- Follow us on social media (@myhavengrace)
- Sign up for our email list
- Leave a review if you’ve used our journals
- Tell a friend
I’m a church/hospice/hospital. Can we partner? Yes. We’re building partnership programs for organizations that want to better support people through grief. Contact us at hello@myhavengrace.com to start the conversation.
QUICK LINKS
- 50 Texts to Send Someone Grieving
- What NOT to Say to Someone Grieving
- Shop Grief Journals
- Contact Us
- Join Our Email List
Still have questions? Email us at hello@myhavengrace.com